Sunday, May 02, 2010

New nickname for Matusow

I'm watching this week's "Poker After Dark." In Wednesday's first segment, Jean-Robert Bellande is short-stacked and moves all-in with K-Q offsuit. He is called by Mike Matusow, with 10-10. Bellande catches a queen on the flop, but Matusow hits his two-outer on the river for trips.

As you may know, for the past couple of years Matusow has been on a "positive thinking" kick. From various interviews and on-camera statements during televised tournaments, it's clear that he really, sincerely, genuinely believes that keeping his thoughts positive affects for the better not just his decision-making, but how the cards come.

You all know by now how I feel about this kind of hooey, don't you? If not, go here to read what I wrote about Jason Alexander, and here to read what I wrote about Shannon Elizabeth, both of whom have publicly espoused similar nutty ideas about poker.

Want to see how stupid this crap is? Consider how it has affected Matusow. Upon seeing that lucky river card, he tells Bellande, "Now you just lost to a guy who hasn't won a coin flip in the last 30 coin flips, and was sitting there expecting to lose."

I see. So that positive thinking is pulling in great results, eh? The outcome of the channeling of your mental energies has been that you now win 1 out of 31 of your 50/50 propositions. Wow. Yeah, that's how I want my tossups to turn out, so, sure, sign me up for this awesome program that you've embraced. I wants me some results like that!

Matusow continues uninterrupted: "But, see, I stayed quiet and stayed positive."

Uh, OK. So you were sitting there "expecting to lose" while you "stayed positive." The man is so stupid he can't even utter two sentences in a row without contradicting himself.

Want another example? On this week's "High Stakes Poker," he and Daniel Negreanu both move all-in on the flop. Negreanu has an overpair--tens--while Matusow has Ac-Qc, for two overcards and the nut flush draw. Matusow says to somebody (not clear who he is addressing), "That's the worst hand he could have had." That's actually about right, given how the betting went. OK so far.

But Negreanu hears that comment and asks, "You're upset I called, Mike?" Matusow replies, "No. I knew what you had. I thought you had nines."

Right. So first you say that pocket tens was the worst hand that Negreanu could have had to make the all-in call. Then you say that you knew what he had (tens). Then you say that you thought he had nines.

It gets better. When the hand ends, they cut to an interview with Matusow conducted later, in which Kara Scott asks him his thoughts during the hand. He says that when Negreanu called his pre-flop raise, "I at this point for sure put him on tens or jacks, maybe even queens. I was hoping it wasn't queens."

So let me get this straight. You were "sure" that he had tens or jacks. Unless he had queens. Or unless he had the nines that you thought he had. But you "knew" what he had.

Matusow, do you even have enough brains to realize how idiotic you are?

Matusow is such a dunderhead that I propose dropping his nickname. I shall no longer refer to him as Mike "The Mouth" Matusow, but instead as Mike "The Moron" Matusow.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Got a new nickname for you - "The Poker Rancor". Or maybe even - "The Poker Misanthrope".

PokerShrink said...

This blog is subtitled: All the things I hate about the game I love. Rakewell keeps to his thesis, even if it is a little cranky. And Matusow's mind does tend to wander aimlessly sometimes, someone should write a book . . .

Anonymous said...

I find the new Matusow very entertaining, and again, much less offensive than Hellmuth. The former is definitely good for poker theatre where the latter is much more moronic and on top of that, grossly infantile, it hurts the game.

Mike said...

I am not sure if you know enough about Matusow, Grump, but you gotta realize that Matusow has a brain disease. He is bipolar and he is taking a lot of meds which obviously mess him up in various ways. You gotta cut the guy some slack based on that.

As for his comment on HSP, I think he meant that was the worst hand he (Matusow) could have had, which is 2 overs and a flush draw. I think he meant that his range there is overpair or overs with flush draw, meaning Negreanu has to be a coin-flip at best. I think it is a bad call by Negreanu. The old Matusow might show up with 2 random overs, but the new, mega tight Matusow I have seen on last few shows will always have the goods. Why is that? I personally suspect he is playing on some kind of stake where he has certain guidelines he must follow by the stakee such as no bluffing and no moves, just ABC tight poker. To be fair, that style works perfectly with HSP lineups and works in regular tournaments. It does not, however, work well in winner-take-all formats.

As for Matusow's comment that he put Negreanu on TT, then he told Kara something else - well, the interview was probably filmed several days or weeks apart from the original session and by then, having played many hands of poker and having his brain messed up on drugs, Matusow might simply forget what was going on...

Rakewell said...

Mike: I went back and listened to it carefully a couple more times, and I think you're right. I think he says it's the worst hand "I" could have had, not "he" as I thought at first. But it goes by really fast, so I'm still not entirely sure.